Wednesday, April 1, 2015


If you can relate to any of these toxic beliefs, remember, you are not alone.  We all have unhealthy thoughts and tendencies buried deep within us that have the potential to sneak up on us sometimes.  The key is awareness – recognizing these beliefs and fixing them before they work their way into your daily routines.

1. The present is indicative of the future
When things aren’t working out in your favor, we often tend to think the future holds more of the same for us. For some odd reason, we don’t have this same train of thought when things are going well. Just because things are going well right now, doesn't indicate that’s how the future will turn out.

2.  It’s too late to make changes
There isn't going to be a perfect path through life for any of us. Often times we have pressure weighing down on us from outside forces like family, friends, and work. If everything doesn't line up perfectly, we often assume we are somehow broken, which isn't true at all. Life is meant to be a beautiful mess, you’re allowed to backtrack and make changes when needed. You just have to turn yourself around and pick something new.

3.  Being vulnerable is dangerous
Society has made us afraid to feel too deeply and afraid to say too much. We are often scared to let people know what they mean to us. This is not healthy. Love is vulnerability. Happiness is vulnerability. If you want to open yourself up to beautiful opportunities, vulnerability is the price you’ll have to pay. Look out at the world and say “This is me! Take me or leave me!”

4.  Being alone is a problem
Wrong! If you aren't comfortable with yourself when you’re with someone else, that is the true problem and it’s time to change that. Relationships need to be chosen wisely. Don’t let loneliness send you back to someone who you don’t belong with. Solitude is incredibly healthy. Love when you’re ready, not when you’re lonely. Learn to love being alone and you will grow as a person more than you could ever imagine.

5.  Fitting in is a good thing
Ignore your doubts. Forget the notion that you need to fit in. It’s time to stand out! Think about it… if you spend your entire life focusing on what everyone else thought about you, wouldn't you eventually forget who you truly are? When you liberate yourself from the opinions of others, your presence with begin to liberate those around you as well.

6. There’s a perfect XYZ for me
Human beings often think perfection is achievable. We search for the perfect lover, friend, job, house, and so on. The problem with chasing perfection, is that it doesn't exist in a static state. Life is a continual journey that is endlessly evolving. Everything that is “perfect” will eventually fade into imperfection. However, with patience and an open mind, an imperfect job can become a rewarding career, an imperfect house becomes a comfortable home. It just a matter of letting go of perfectionism.

7. What everyone does to you is personal
People can become toxic to themselves and others around them when they believe that everything happening in the world is a direct attack on them, or is in some way all about them. However, the truth is, what other people say and do to you is more about them, than you. The way people react to you is directly correlated to their life experiences, wounds, and their perspectives. Whether people think you’re amazing or believe you’re worthless, this is again, more about them. I’m not saying we should be come narcissists and ignore the criticism we receive, but what I am saying is that a great deal of our sadness, hurt, and disappointment comes from taking things personally. Just let go of their opinion and use your intuition as a guide.

8. You should never be sad
The constant desire for happiness is what makes us miserable. Nothing in life is constant. There will never be permanent happiness and there will never be absolute sadness. Our moods will always swing between these two extremes. Without one there cannot be the other. At any given moment we’re comparing how we feel to how we felt on another occasion – comparing one level of our contentment to another. Go out and live life to the fullest, enjoy the highs and embrace the lows. The positives and the negatives and everything in between. Don’t simply focus on happiness, but focus on a well-rounded life.

The Floor Is Yours
So, which of these toxic beliefs sometimes sneak up on you?  What other toxic beliefs have held you back?  How have you coped?  Leave a comment below and share your thoughts and insights with us.

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